My Sins are Gone

Wilderness Day 5: We started an Alpine hike at 3 am to begin day 5 and this is a recap of my ascension to the top of the mountain.  We carried rocks with us to represent our sin then threw them off of the mountain to represent that we are forgiven and our sins are gone.

As I lay in my sleeping bag
my eyes awoke to a starlight sky
surrounded by only the darkness
surrounded by only the wilderness
in a hurry I grabbed my pack and began to hike
my only vision granted from my head and the stars above
all to catch the sun climbing into the sky
I hiked up steep inclines and slopes
covered in rocks and stones
on my ascension,
I grabbed the biggest rock I could bare
placed it in my hands
and carried its burdens over my head
the one who went before me did the same
so how could I rest?
how could I give in?
he carried everyone's rock
and I could hardly carry one
as I reached the mountain's peak
my arms quivering, strength dwindling
I took my rock to the edge
and sent it diving down the mountainside
when the rock landed it shattered into pieces
the work finished as I said,
"My sins are gone."

Our stories

Wilderness Day 5: I realized how freeing it was to share my life story with a huge group of people and how blessed we all are to have friendship filled with love and a God who is relentless.

My heart given the opportunity to pour out
to overflow, to destroy the dam repressing it
its story flows to others
in hope to encourage
in hope to strengthen
the stories of others grace my heart
one's of deceased parents
one's of uncertainty
one's of addiction
all seeking healing, love, and friendship
all desiring life to the full
all needing to feel most alive
all stories written by God
God has just authored the beginning
and will write until the ink leaves his pen.

A Perfect Portrait

Wilderness Day 4: Just wondering over the beautiful artistry of God.

I wake on an early July myorning
granted the opportunity of silence
to fill my soul with peace
my eyes are blessed
they see an unbelievable sight
graced with the intricate stokes of the Lord
they see creation carved by God's fingertips
a painting only God could master
perfect shades of green, brown, and white
he uses his sun to add shadows and depth
and uses his sky as the backdrop
to highlight the mountain skyline
a portrait only God could perfect

A Young Man's Heart

Wilderness Day 3: In the Early Afternoon after we had time to share life stories and discuss some of what God has placed in the Bible for us, I wrote this poem.

To unravel one's mind is a tricky bit
to unravel another's takes some wit
the mind is filled with the right answers,
but that's just the start
if you dig deeper you'll find a man's heart
raw, bare, and flawed,
but the heart is where truth sleeps
emotions buried deep down
they don't come out
you give them no sound
you lock them up and store them away
while your heart runs wild
and all you feel is dismay
one day you will use the key
pour out your heart and its doubts
expose your heart to the light
and share your deepest darkest plights
when the rubble and clout disappear
you will find love has come near

Finger Mesa

Wilderness Day 3: We peaked Finger Mesa and had some time to reflect and rest after our long hike. Here are my thoughts and my view from the mountain.

I sit atop Finger Mesa
at the pinnacle
on the highest rock
a bounty of rocks surrounded
with luscious green pastures
every direction I look
mountains upon mountains
as if God had huge blocks of Earth
and began carving with his bare hands
and carved for days and days
sculpting plateaus and peaks
ridges and slopes
decorated precisely
streams slithering through the valleys
patches of snow
and legions of trees
all born from God's hand in one day
the only explanation
God the creator of all

God's Hand

Wilderness Day 2: I woke up and grabbed a seat right by the lake in a valley surrounded by mountains and was blessed with this beautiful view and beautiful thoughts.

I rise on an early July morning
all I see is God's creation
the deep oranges and yellows rise with me
the vivid rays reflecting off the lake
as a foggy mist glides over its reflection
the sky an easy blue
with no clouds blocking my view
all I hear is God's creation
the squawking of his birds
the bellowing of his cows
the intentional moments of silence
to hear his precious whispers
all that are with me are God's creation
guides to show us the way of the trail
leaders to show the young Christ's way
and young men seeking and yearning for a way to live
all I am surrounded by is God's creation
the mountains of San Juan containing it all
its ridges and peaks
its dives and climbs
its overlaps and ranges
engulfing us into a valley
the size of God's hand
his hand holding only
majestic, raw, unrivaled beauty

Beautiful Disaster

Wilderness Day 1:  On the way to Wilderness I was thinking of my salvation and how Jesus has changed my life.


Every inch of me broke
on every word I choke
my heart ripped in two
my mind beaten black and blue
all by my choice
all done by my voice
my choice to please me
my voice says, "leave me be"
I run away, don't look back
I run down my own track
I am like a stray sheep
my price is not cheap,
but my shepherd buys me still
he wants my heart to be fulfilled
he buys me with his own blood
his love rushes over me like a flood
he take me to the river to drink
my sins are gone as I blink
my life starts brand new
my mind with a clear view
my shepherd saved my soul
as he paid my price and my toll